Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
