I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
