i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Randomize