that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Randomize
