distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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