this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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