he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
don't judge my taste in strippers
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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