How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
