loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
