but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
