I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
