i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Randomize
