No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Randomize
