And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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