if you like me you must not know who I am
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
