I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
we're making bets on your personal life
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Randomize
