is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
