It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
Randomize