super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
It's official drugs can't kill me
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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