Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
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