Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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