Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
