we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
