is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Randomize