Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
