google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Randomize
