3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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