Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
