I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize