It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
dude. I can hear the air.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
Randomize