i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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