Tell her she can't have a vagina
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Randomize
