Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize