I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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