So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
He better not be in your backpack
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize