I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
