Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Randomize
