Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
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