I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
