You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize