she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I want you more than these girls want KFC
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
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