After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize
