I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
