VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
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