So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
I just spread your mom's ashes with my new girlfriend. I wouldve waited for you to fly home but she was uncomfortable in the house with her remains there. I'll mail you the urn since u handpainted it.
YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND ALREADY!?! WTF WE JUST HAD HER FUNERAL 3 WEEKS AGO!!!!!!!!!!!!
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
