all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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