How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Randomize
