Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
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