Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
I feel great
I just peed on a car
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize