You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
There are leaves in my underwear?
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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